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Fan Fics Place for your fan fictions

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  #1  
Old 2003-11-26, 22:09
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lembo lembo is offline
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In The Suppressed Flight of Angels...

Okay.......one of my short stories. Its not particularly special, and it really is pretty short, but you're welcome to read it and post comments etc Its called 'In The Suppressed Flight of Angels'...

I'll post my new LBA-fic (new *bad* LBA-fic) up here just as soon as i've finished writing it, so sorry for the off topic.....
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  #2  
Old 2003-11-26, 23:18
Atresica Atresica is offline
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It is an interesting piece, though difficult to understand what's going on. I must say it's even a bit poetic
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Old 2003-11-26, 23:20
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Jeesh, that's some pretty deep stuff there.

I really like the foreboading style of the narrator and how you used repitition on the last page to raise tension and emotion. As a whole though, I found the story to be rather vague. Maybe its because you meant for it to be an abstract story. Its got a nice moral to it, thought it takes a while to dig through it. Your story kind of reminded me of what Edgar Alen Poe would write (no, this does not mean I think you're on opium -_-). It has a very gothic feel to it.

There is just one thing I was not quite clear on, and that was why the angel's were murdered.
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  #4  
Old 2003-11-27, 00:00
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lembo lembo is offline
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lol, thanks

it *is* very vague, i'm going to write another version of it sometime with everything that happens in it and see how it turns out. I have the entire story planned out, but i just cut large chunks out because i thought it felt better like that, thus it turns out to be very abstract. I like people to make up their own minds about exactly what happens, but obviously, the problem with that is that it *does* leave it very vague. I can fill you in on a few of the details as *i* see them if you want me to? I'll try to work on it being a little less vague while still retaining its style. I dunno though.....was the style good or bad did you think?

the responses you've given have a) been great, thank you and b) have been very interesting........to be honest, i'd never even thought about them being actual angels, but it actually fits with the religious subtext pretty well.

LW> i always thought that they both died because of the choices which they made about freedom, one died for the choice they made, the other died because of the choice that they made. Thats just how i felt though, as i said, its left completly open to interpretation.

tres> if it sounds slightly poetic, its probably because i write poetry mainly rather than stories

LW> i don't think its particularly deep stuff at all i think it just likes to pretend that it is

thank you both very much for reading it and giving your opinions i appreciate it loads
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Old 2003-11-27, 00:11
Lightwing Lightwing is offline
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no problem -_-

You write great stuff and its goot to have another contributor of your calibur. Good luck on the rest of your works.
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  #6  
Old 2004-01-15, 03:32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lightwing
Your story kind of reminded me of what Edgar Alen Poe would write.
somebody else who likes his edgar alen poe a lot has also said this recently. He was *very* surprised to find that i've actually never ever read any Poe or Lovecraft. hmmm...i'm intrigued. In a good way

anyway, the main reason for this post:

Just a quick note to say i haven't forgotten about my LBA Fanfic. It's not too long but i had some trouble about half way through and just couldn't write any more on it for a while, then when i got back it was difficult to get back into it, but it *will* be finished soon i promise, possibly even tonight if i get a lot done on it. Hopefully it'll be a little interesting too, not the same kind of content as the usual fanfics i don't think, but you'll see and you can decide for yourself.
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Old 2004-01-16, 02:40
Lightwing Lightwing is offline
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Hey, welcome back!

I'm happy to know that you are still active!

Good luck on your writting!
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