"Alas, alas", cried Legolas!

[Mia]

OK, well this may not be of interest to those of you who have not read (or seen) Lord of the Rings, but anyway...

My friends and I are having a small poetry competition, the only conditions being that it has to have a rhyme scheme and start with the line "Alas, alas", cried Legolas! That was a line from the book that one of them kept reading over again, so we decided to make poetry out of it...

Mine:

"Alas, alas!" cried Legolas
"Something awful's come to pass
I'm not sure what it is quite yet,
But it's quite awful, you can bet!

I need to find someone to blame
And then find someone and complain
And then I need to find out
What dreadful thing has come about!"


He tried to blame the poor Frodo
But in vain, for he was dead as a dodo
And then he tried to complain to Sam
But Sam sat there, bleating like a lamb.


Gabdalf and Gimli would not listen
And Strider and Arwen were busy kissing.
And when he tried Pippin and Merry,
They fell asleep - and he got angry.


As he was yelling, Boromir came,
And yelled "Shut up! Is this a game?"
This remark made Legolas hurt
And so he shouted - "You're a jerk!"


And so the terrible thing he'd feared
Came about, whilst Boromir jeered
He pushed Legolas right off the cliff
And then put his hair up in a quiff.

Strider and Arwen broke apart
And Strider said "Now, have a heart!
Legolas is not wicked or mean
Enough for you to push him - unseen.

You vile wretch - alas, alack
You must now go fetch Legolas back
For he is noble, good and true
Unlike someone Boromir - YOU!"

With that our heroes went to seek
Legolas who'd fallen in the creek
Except for Sam who was quite mad
And Frodo, who was dead (how sad!)

Pippin and Merry had awoken
Once they had heared how Strider had spoken
To Boromir, who now in shame
Was weeping, for he was to blame.

And Gandalf and Gimli were mortified
That they were deaf to Legolas's cries
Of there being something about to occur
They's just kept stroking the rabbit's fur.

So our heroes came to the river
Where Legolas had fallen (with his quiver)
They fished him out, bow, arrows and all
But he was in shock from is great fall

He started gibbering of cats and hares,
Of bullfrogs, shoes and teddy bears
And soon it seemed was mad as Sam
(who still did impressions of a lamb).

The fellowship went back to camp
And Arwen lit a special lamp
She brewed up an unusual stew
And fed it to Legolas, who said "Moo".

Then he was insane no longer
And his muscles got much stronger
So he picked up Boromir
And threw him in the river, without fear

So the moral of this tale is do not shout
At someone who is shouting about
Something that they think is bad
Or you will end up feeling sad.


Excerpts from Claire's:

"Alas, alas!" cried Legolas
"My quiver - it is missing
I must have lost it when I saw
Strider and Arwen kissing.


"I'll search for it over hill and dale
Through forest and through fen
I'll brave the slopes of Gorgaroth
To fetch it back again!"

"Ah, I see, my quiver lies
Over there on yonder rock
I would continue, but I feel
A swift attack of writer's block!"




Any of you who would like to join in are most welcome!

[LBAWinOwns]

fan fics forum perhaps ?

[Mouserz]

Originally Posted by LBAWinOwns

fan fics forum perhaps ?

i think off topic goes better since its not a LBA fanfic

[Echomote]

Legolas isn't an LBA character? I should go play the game again sometime

[Q-Wi-Q]

love the poem, safe for the last four-five verses. Might wanna rethink those?